Saturday, March 3, 2012

#1 Bad Ass!

Here we go the tournament of tournaments, the kumite of kick ass if you will.  Match ups between some of the greatest fiction characters of all time added with a few real life bad asses in the tournament to end all tournaments!
Round 1 FIGHT!

Bruce Lee Vs. John McClane

Winner: John McClane.
Sure Bruce Lee is a kung fu master but John McClane has gone against kung fu masters before and come out on top, and that was even in his later years.  Yippie Kye Aye Muther Fucker!

Rambo Vs. Dirty Harry

Winner: Rambo
Rambo has annihilated well trained armies single handed with only his knife.  Dirty Harry is just a hard boiled detective trying to clean up the mean streets of San Francisco.  Sure his gun gives him a bonus but that's all he has.  He better hit Rambo in one shot because if not THROAT RIP MUTHA FUCKA!

Col. James Braddock Vs. Jason Bourne

Winner: Braddock
When working at the office don't ask Chuck Norris for his three hole punch, Jason Bourne did and exploded.

Snake Pliskin Vs Frank Martin

Winner: Snake Pliskin
He has an eye patch, automatic win.  He can also call upon the help from his good buddy Jack Burton if things get in a pinch.

James Bond Vs. John Conner

Winner: James Bond
John Conner is too much of a whiny bitch.  James bond would go back in time kill Kyle Reese and make sweet love to Ms. Conner making John Bond leader of the pantie resistance.

Indiana Jones Vs. Dominic Torretto

Winner: Indiana Jones
Why is Dominic Toretto even on this list?

Rocky Balboa Vs. Sgt Riggs

Winner: Riggs
With Murtough watching his back he'll never lose.

Ash Williams Vs. Jack Bauer

Winner: Ash
Ash slices that boner in half with his chain saw, fucks his daughter, then writes a book about it.  All while signing autographs for his devout fans.

Well that's it for Round 1 stay tuned for round 2 very soon.

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